This Page

has been moved to new address

Tonya Harding's Jeans Are the Best Aphrodisiac

Sorry for inconvenience...

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
Hipstercrite: Tonya Harding's Jeans Are the Best Aphrodisiac

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Tonya Harding's Jeans Are the Best Aphrodisiac


I discovered via one of my favorite websites, Buzzfeed, that ex figure-skater/Queen of the Mom Jean Tonya Harding has a website.

It's just not any ol' website.

Ms. Harding shares with us beautiful photos center-piecing full denim ensembles, passive-agressive comments like, "Tonya Harding is an intelligent, caring and very sensitive person. Even though she will deny it to some of her friends, ugly remarks hurt her feelings", and erotic fan fiction.

Yep.

Just when *you thought you didn't have an outlet for your fantasies involving circa 1990 sequined leotards and crimped hair, you find out about Tonya Harding Fantasies.
*You=I.

Tonya Harding Fantasies isn't new. In fact, there are over 1587 stories from various shut-ins, illiterates, sexually frustrated middle-aged shoe salesman, and 26 year-old female bloggers from Austin.

Here are some snippets of my favorite Tonya Harding fanstasies....




Here is one of my Tonya Harding fantasies that I've been working on for awhile:

Tonya,
Ur high waisted stone washed jeans r so sexy. I just want to put them on and pretend that I am Kelly Kapowski. I will figure skate around in ur jeans and the judges will give me 99.99 for the most awesome camel toe they have ever seen. When I'm done skating, I will fall into a bed of scrunchies and make sweet love to a man w/ a mustache. Please don't join us. My Tonya Harding fantasy has nothing to do with u. In fact, I don't even want u watching. Just give me the jeans, scrunchies, and Jeff Gillooly. U just keep standing next to that tree.

Luv,
Lauren





Labels:

49 Comments:

At 9:02 AM, Blogger Hannah Miet said...

Sometimes you are so funny that my stomach inverts into itself because I'm laughing but I haven't eaten yet and I think things like "I hate you, Lauren! I want to bang Kelly Kapowski!"

And then I die.

 
At 9:21 AM, Blogger Hipstercrite said...

hannah- you're a good part of the reason why i keep writing. thank you.

 
At 9:24 AM, Blogger Jill said...

LOL ohmigosh those photos and jeans are horrendous! Who poses by a tree in mom jeans? It should be against the law.

 
At 9:33 AM, Blogger Hannah Miet said...

Ok, before the legions come marching in...once more, for the record,

I LOVE YOU.

 
At 9:46 AM, Blogger Sassy said...

This is so many kinds of fantastic.

 
At 9:48 AM, Blogger That Chelsea Girl™ said...

Grrross! Definitely not a fan of hers.

 
At 9:54 AM, Blogger inflammatory writ said...

This is one of the most hilarious things I've read on the internet. That is saying a lot.

 
At 10:18 AM, Blogger thatgalkiki said...

What did we DO before cyberspace? I LOVE this. Thank you, Twitter.

*applause*

Love!

 
At 10:29 AM, Blogger L.L. said...

I loved this entry - but mostly just wanted to swing by and tell yo congrats for being a blog of note! Awesome!

 
At 10:32 AM, Blogger Millions Of Atoms Man said...

I'm not going to her website. Ever. But confirm my hunch that 95 percent of the "Tonya Harding Fantasy Series" involves lead pipes and Nancy Kerrigan. I know I'm right, I just need independent verification.

Oh, and congratulations on Blog of Note also...

 
At 11:19 AM, Blogger Iva said...

haha! hilarious!! LOL

 
At 12:10 PM, Blogger Mrs. M. said...

ca-ca-ca-camel toe.

 
At 1:43 PM, Blogger ALittleGuitar said...

i knew tonya was my kinda gal when she referred to her cigarettes as 'my vitamins.'

 
At 1:44 PM, Blogger Hipstercrite said...

Jill- Funny thing is, that picture was taken in '99, not '89!

Inflammatory Writ- Thanks for stopping by and your message. It made my day :D

Thatgalkiki- Isn't Twitter amazing!?

L.L. + Millions of Atoms Man + Ivy- thanks!!!

 
At 4:14 PM, Blogger Gadget and Technology said...

oo .. you are very beautiful

 
At 5:02 PM, Blogger Ana Renault said...

hey, ijust wanted to say that brazilians reads your blog too! since I discovered it,i really enjoy to read it! You are SOOO funny!
And, for god sake, where did you find that woman?!? =O
godd luck for her. And, please, don't stop writting.
"Um blog digno de se ler. Inacreditável"

 
At 5:04 PM, Blogger James Deagle said...

"Tonya Harding's Jeans Are the Best Aphrodisiac"

There's a sentence (and a notion) that my brain wasn't expecting to process when I got up this morning...lol.

 
At 5:20 PM, Blogger becky said...

hahah Hilarious I agree.Dont cha just love those jeans hahah.Oh the hair too lolllllll.

 
At 5:57 PM, Blogger Auto Blogger said...

It was very nice to read this post..... Great :)

 
At 7:02 PM, Blogger Harvey K said...

Finally a place for all my Tonya Harding erotic fan fiction.

Hilarious website btw. Congrats on being a blog of note.

 
At 7:30 PM, Blogger Online Deal Shopper said...

your well funny :-) love what you do

 
At 8:09 PM, Blogger denysmaco0l said...

nice post!!!
please visit me back...

thanks..

 
At 9:52 PM, Blogger Eva O'Dell said...

HaHaHa. She totally creeps me out!

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger ahsan hussain said...

nise blog

 
At 1:08 AM, Blogger The villager: said...

I'm seeing Tonya Harding in a whole new light !

 
At 1:09 AM, Blogger A Good Moroccan said...

Great blog ! Well done.

 
At 1:14 AM, Blogger blessingsgoddess said...

I can't get Tonya out of my head now.....

 
At 1:50 AM, Blogger LaptopTraveller said...

so funny. =)

 
At 4:08 AM, Blogger king jersn said...

ugg boots 50 usd
air jordan shoes 35usd

http://www.ecplazawhole.com

 
At 4:26 AM, Blogger J&D said...

跳蛋,情人趣味用品,按摩棒,性行為補給站,性行為,情趣商品,自慰套,情趣精品,跳蛋情人趣味,按摩情人趣味,小澤瑪莉亞,松島楓,倉井空,情人趣味用品娃,情趣內褲


潤滑情人趣味,愛戀情人用品,情人美姬用品,充氣情人趣味,性感情人趣味,鈴木麻奈美,早川瀨里奈,雨宮琴音,石川鈴華,蒼井空,情人趣味用品珠,情趣睡衣


情人趣味用品液,情趣味用品,情趣貼圖,嘿咻情趣網,情趣色情小說


情趣用品,愛爾蘭情趣,情人趣味愛蜜莉,情人趣味用品轉

情趣用品,飛機杯,情趣用品,aio交友愛情館,一葉情貼圖片區,一葉晴貼影片區,情趣用品店 


 情趣商品

 
At 4:32 AM, Blogger ARTISANNE said...

This is funny! :0)

 
At 4:42 AM, Blogger Lola Lakely said...

I agree with the guy who wrote in Chinese. His viewpoint was both philosophically and morally aligned with mine.

I found you through blogs of note and realized that you are awesome. You had me at Kelly Kapowski but I have to admit I will stuck around to see more pictures of Tonya hiding coquetishly behind a tree.

 
At 4:42 AM, Blogger Lola Lakely said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 4:44 AM, Blogger Moni said...

Don,t cha just love me

 
At 5:41 AM, Blogger joehebden said...

Well done on blogs of note !

 
At 5:46 AM, Blogger Kate said...

Who is Tonya Harding? I've never heard of her.

 
At 6:22 AM, Blogger Kimberly Nestler said...

I suppose most have commited this fashion faux paux, I remember my mom making me where a pair at 8, along with a long jean skirt and flannels that made me look like I was part of the Four Non-Blondes. All hail the early 90s! NOT.

 
At 6:27 AM, Blogger VIVI 情趣精品 said...

情趣商品

情趣精品

情趣用品

情趣味用品

情趣用品坊

情趣用品店

情趣用品網站

情趣用品專賣店

情人趣味

情色遊戲

情人趣味用品

情趣

情色

色情

色遊戲

一夜情

色情網站

情色自拍

情人趣味愛蜜莉

情人趣味用品液

情人趣味用品轉

情人趣味用品娃

情人趣味用品珠

情人趣味用品店

情人趣味用品控制

 
At 6:19 PM, Blogger Heather said...

No acid washed jeans should be complete without a camel toe. Love this!!!

 
At 7:07 PM, Blogger lostupire said...

LOL. I just found your blog and I must admit, we have a lot of the same opinions, only you are ALOT funnier than me.

Definitely going to read some more later.

 
At 7:51 PM, Blogger Ari R. said...

I just found you blog today, and I'm glad I did. Why should I bother doing my physics homework when I can be reading Tonya Harding Fantasies?

You're blog is fantastic and you've made the world a better (or at least more tolerable)place. Thank you and have a lovely day.

 
At 9:46 PM, Blogger Gillian said...

Congratulations on your blogs of note.

Hi from a Scots lass living in South Africa.

Love your blog...

 
At 10:34 PM, Blogger Zaharia said...

nice...or how the french say crestere

 
At 9:49 AM, Blogger 幸福人生 said...

情趣商品,情人趣味愛蜜莉,情人趣味用品液,影音情人趣味,角色情人趣味,新情人趣味,情人節禮品,露點自拍,性感內衣,角色扮演,情人趣味用品,情人趣味用品娃,情人趣味用品轉,潤滑情人趣味,情人趣味用品珠,丁字褲情人趣味,保險套情人趣味,性感情人趣味,日本情人趣味,按摩情人趣味,打飛機情人趣味,跳蛋情人趣味,比基尼情人趣味,情趣禮品,C字褲,馬甲情人趣味,刺激情人趣味,充氣情人趣味,美國情人趣味,震動情人趣味,自衛器,自衛杯

 
At 9:50 AM, Blogger 幸福人生 said...

情趣用品,情趣用品店,飛機杯,按摩棒,自慰套,SM,吊帶襪,潤滑液,跳蛋,性感睡衣,充氣娃娃,角色扮演,G點,高潮,性感,威而柔,跳蛋情人趣味,跳蛋情人,跳蛋影片,跳蛋變頻,跳蛋調情,按摩器,按摩椅,按摩半套,按摩全套,按摩精油,吊帶襪影片,自衛方法,自衛棒,自慰器專賣店

 
At 8:34 AM, Blogger jun said...

視訊美女,視訊,視訊交友90739,免費視訊,免費視訊美女,影音視訊交友網,視訊kk俱樂部,視訊美女kk俱樂部,視訊聊天kk俱樂部,視訊聊天,視訊聊天網

 
At 4:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

скачать хорошее кино кино в хорошем качестве скачать

 
At 6:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi,

Thanks for sharing the link - but unfortunately it seems to be not working? Does anybody here at hipstercrite.blogspot.com have a mirror or another source?


Thanks,
Jules

 
At 7:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Растаможка Киев, Одесса
Консультации ВЭД
Дима Литейный
logisticskiev7@yandex.ru
+38 093 318 1567

 

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home