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Hipstercrite: Lolita

Monday, July 21, 2008


My diet is becoming one slice of pizza every day from the The Pizza House with the blue tarp next door.
When the nice middle-aged Armenian man came up to the window tonight, my heart hiccuped. He reminded me of actor James Mason and for some reason I found that sexy. I happen to be reading Lolita right now as well and I'm trying to understand the psychological undertone of why I'd find someone who looks Humbert Humbert attractive. In actuality I find him repulsive. Not the Armenian man, but the character.

I was at The Pig again today. I noticed a man drink his drink in a caveman-like manner. It appeared that he was going to eat the glass he was drinking from. Once he finished eating his cup, he decided to stare at my crotch for about 45 minutes. I moved and put my crotch underneath a table, but that didn't stop him from starring. As I left, I walked up to him, he smiled, I leaned down to him and said, "Stop staring at me." His smile quickly faded and he got up and stormed past me out the door. I waited a beat or two for him to clear and my nerves to calm. I walked to my car and a sweet patron followed me out to make sure I was ok. He had a hell of a name that I can remember for the life of me. It was spelled something like Tsetiong or something like that. Nice guy. I told him he should come to a friend's show at UCB Theatre on Wednesday.


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