SXSW 2010 Film Lineup: The Forgotten Stepchild

All this talk about the SXSW 2010 Music lineup!
But what about the movies, huh?
You know, SXSW ain't too shabby in the film department. The festival has introduced us to such great hits as: I Love You Man, Moon, Adventureland, Hurt Locker, 21, American Teen, Choke, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Shine a Light.

Here are some highlights of the SXSW 2010 Film lineup:

It's Austin, Why Wouldn't There Be a Bunch of Movies About Music?
-Lemmy- All I know about Lemmy is that he has a mustache that can kill. And he looks like he belongs in a gay porno. I don't think I like Motorhead, but I'm sure this doc rocks nonetheless.

-The White Stripes Under Great White Northern Lights- Why wouldn't the White Stripes come up with such an epic title for their documentary? This doc follows the band across Canada as they converge on their 10th anniversary performance.

-The Runaways- This film about the 70's rock band, The Runaways, stars Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning and premiered last month at Sundance. After seeing the trailer, I gotta admit, it looks pretty fanfuckingtastic in a I'd-totally-grow-a-mullet-if-I-could-act-like-Joan-Jett-and-crush-some-balls kind of way.

Movies I Kind Of Want To See:

-Elektra Luxx- Story of a porn star (Carla Gugino) who gets pregnant. That part I don't care about. It's the starring Timothy Olyphant and Joseph Gordon-Levitt part I like (something about this movie says The Girl Next Door)

-Lebanon, PA- Any self-discovery movie set in a Rust Belt city is a winner in my book!

-Leaves of Grass- A movie where Edward Norton plays twin brothers, also stars Susan Sarandon, Richard Dreyfuss, and Keri Russell, and directed by Tim Blake Nelson!? Where do I sign up!

-Cyrus- Baghead and The Puffy Chair directors Jay and Mark Duplass are back with a film about a lonely divorcee (John C. Reilly) who meets a beautiful woman (Marisa Tomei), but discovers he must compete with the woman's 21 year-old son (Jonah Hill). You had me until Jonah Hill.

-Get Low- Story of a hermit in the 1930's who planned his own funeral. Starring Robert Duvall, Bill Murray, and Sissy Spacek. Yay! Hopefully another excuse for Bill Murray to come to Austin and hang out for a month and drink.

-Kick Ass- A movie about a teenage comic book fan who decides to become a super hero!? Holy shit!

Documentaries Are To Film Festivals What Crack Is To ________:
-People Vs. George Lucas- I have no idea who this guy is, but I guess they made a documentary about him.

-American Grindhouse- Documentary that explores exploitation cinema. No, Quentin Tarantino didn't produce this.

Documentaries Dealing with Sports That I Most Likely Will Never See:
-One Night in Vegas- The love story between Mike Tyson and Tupac Shakur.

-No Crossover: The Trial of Allen Iverson- ESPN film digs into the '93 trial of Allen Iverson. Iverson, a respected basketball player, found himself in jail after a fight broke out between his entourage (all black) and a group of white patrons. See, Mom! You'd be proud of me. I do know a little about the NBA.

Couldn't Get Through the Trailer Because It Gave Me Too Much Anxiety-
-Cargo- Space horror movie in Swiss.

Movies That Sound Like They'll Make Me Stab My Eyes Out With My Thumbs While Viewing Them:

-Saturday Night- A documentary by James Franco about the current lineup of SNL? Ha, I'd rather get the rest of this root canal taken care of.

-Barry Munday- Dude loses his penis. Was going to star Luke Wilson, but now stars Patrick Wilson.

Who?

-MacGruber- Why do you tease with my emotions, SNL?! I despise what you have become, but an 80's tv show spoof starring Jason Bateman and Val Kilmer sounds....so good.

Maybe I Want to See If I Could Understand What the Heck They Were Saying-

-Le Donk & Scor-Zay-Zee- Described as a Christopher Guest-like film, this British "mockumentary" follows loser musician Le Donk and his quest to introduce the world to the very white, very clueless rapper extraordinaire Scor-Zay-Zee.