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"True Blood" Season Finale Left Me Angry and Confused (Enough Spoilers to Ruin the Whole Episode)

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Hipstercrite: "True Blood" Season Finale Left Me Angry and Confused (Enough Spoilers to Ruin the Whole Episode)

Monday, September 14, 2009

"True Blood" Season Finale Left Me Angry and Confused (Enough Spoilers to Ruin the Whole Episode)

As Lafayette would say, "That was some mother-f*ckin' sh*t, bitches." (I don't really feel like swearing this morning).

WHAT HAPPENED?! Did the writers take a vacation the last few weeks of "True Blood"? How did the beginning of the season start so promising , yet end up as a directionless mess? The season definitely plateaued at episode 9," "I Will Rise Up" (when Godric dies, Eric's crying looks like he's laughing like Jerry Lewis, and Sookie wears a tacky red Gingham dress from Forever 21). Now that was some powerful sh*t right there.

Last night's episode, "Beyond Here Lies Nothin'", was quite possibly the worst episode of the season. The ridiculous Maryanne story line ended 30 minutes too early with a David Lynch-esque scene involving blue filters and a bull. After that, the writers bade their time with pointless dialogue and non-story driving scenes. I kept waiting for Maryanne to spring back from the dead, but no such luck. Instead we got dialogue along the lines of, "I don't know about you, but last night was kind of hard for me too" (Said by Sam to Sookie the day after he had his guts cut out by a devil-worshipping Maenad, turned into a bull, and then pierced said Maenad through the heart with his antlers.) Thankfully, Bill didn't have enough scenes to annoy the living sh*t out of us. The Lawrence Oliver deliveries were kept to a minimum and luckily for us, he was kidnapped at the end of the episode. Currently on the HBO homepage, lies an image of Bill and Sookie in an embrace with the words, "Who Captured Bill?" at the top. The answer is, "Nobody cares".


-What in God's name was the point of Queen Sophie-Anne (Evan Rachel Wood)? Her character did absolutely nothing to the story line. Her house was more fascinating than her. Unless she's coming back for the third season, that was the worst use of a character since, since...nothing! She tops it! Secondly, as beautiful and charming as Evan Rachel Wood is, she's highly unbelievable as a centuries old, ball-busting vixen. Though she may have dated Marilyn Manson, the 22 year-old actress really showed her age trying to force a maturity that only seasoned actresses have.

-The scenes with Eric were pointless. He had absolutely nothing to do with the story line involving Maryanne but was nonetheless forced into it. Let's face it, Eric has become one of the driving forces of the show. The writers know that if he's not in an episode, True Blood fans will most likely throw bottles of overly-priced "Tru Blood" at their windows.

-Eggs' death was forced. We all know he was going to die. Our little Tara could never have true happiness, but why not kill him off during the sacrifice scene? That would have made more sense. But no, you had to fill the holes of the last 30 minutes by making him occasionally pop out of the woods, bat sh*t crazy, and yielding a large knife.


-Jason's single tear that ran down his cheek as he watched his Gran's house get defiled by the townspeople.

-Sam's abs post getting stabbed in them.

-Jane Bodehouse's smile (the crazy lady who cut off her finger). She deserves the award for "Best Shit Eating Grin".

-Bill courting Sookie. It was nice to see the characters get back to the way they were before we ever discovered how annoying they actually are.



At 12:14 PM, Blogger PoliticsChick said...

Ok, you couldn't be more dead on with the Tru Blood comments.

I kept thinking, 'Was I the only one wondering what hoe-down Sookie was going to with that dress on?'

Though I did think Eric's scenes involving Godric's death were moving. Let me not start talking about his bedroom scene with Sookie. Which is now the driving force behind me tuning in the past few weeks.

The queen - sigh - boring. EVW is just too young and not seasoned enough to pull this off. Just because you're pasty doesn't mean you'll play a good vampire.

All-in-all, the most excitement for me is when the Queen ordered Eric not to bite Sookie, cause all I could think of was Eric's nature. Tell him not to do it and he'll do it. I'm ready for some Sookie and Eric loving - forget boring ass Bill.

If you'd like I'll even tell you what Sookie is, perhaps that will save you from waiting an entire year for the new season!

At 12:42 PM, Blogger That Chelsea Girlâ„¢ said...

I've only watched this show a couple of times....

At 1:38 PM, Blogger Obi Wan-g-ari said...

I completely agree...the maryanne storyline seemed rushed and the fact that about half the episode was left when she was killed by sam had me wondering how they would fill the rest of the time and i guess so did they hence the rushed and not so interesting ending to what had been a great season.
but i will still be watching when it finally returns to our screens :)

At 5:43 PM, Blogger Jayedid said...

If you have read the books this series is based on, then you are extremely confused by these story lines. I was almost numb to what was going on in the story because I know how it goes in the book, and alas, I am a die hard fan of the novels. It definately keeps me guessing though, although I'm not sure if that's a good think or not yet...

At 6:35 PM, Blogger Katie said...

Thank you for articulating all my True Blood frustrations into more than just "This show's so effing out of control, I don't even like it anymore," which is all I've been able to muster these past few weeks.

At 10:31 AM, Blogger Heather said...

I agree the stupid Maryanne plot was too rushed.

I know that the queen has to come back next season because she said that no one better find out about her forcing Eric to sell vampire blood. I'm thinking that's why Bill got kidnapped.

I'm sure the show will bounce back from the ridiculousness that was the last couple episodes.

At 11:07 AM, Blogger Hipstercrite said...

PoliticsChick and Jayedid- Should I read the books?Are they worth it?

That Chelsea Girl- well getting watching the show, girl! It's worth it (even though I gave the finale a scathing review)

Obi Wan-g-ari- I'll definitely be tuning back next season nonetheless (need to get my Eric fill!)

Katie- Believe me, it was hard to articulate anything these past few weeks. I felt the same way! Mostly shouting at the screen, going "WTF?!"

Heather- I think you're right.

At 11:16 AM, Blogger mysterg said...

You know I really did not have you down as a fan of this show...interesting.

At 2:03 PM, Blogger Hipstercrite said...

Mysterg- I can't believe it either.

At 4:19 PM, Blogger Angie said...

Agree 100% with everything you just said. The main event of the episode happened way too quickly, and although Evan Rachel Wood was great in The Wrestler, we found she couldn't act for shite in this series. You're right, she didn't belong as this character.

At 6:15 PM, Blogger Hannah Miet said...

I am commenting to inform you that, sadly, I do not have HBO in my new apartment. But I will refer back to this as soon as soon as I get to watch the season. Or, as soon as I have to edit an article for the paper I work for that's about the finale anyway. That is all.

At 7:49 PM, Blogger Random Thinker said...

YES! True Blood totally jumped the shark the second Terry said "Don't hurt my special lady." Seriously, these zombies thrive on violence, and Terry wouldn't care if his lover was about to get a nailgun to the head. I am so disappointed, and was rooting for the show to get better after that - I'm shocked that it got worse and worse and worse. Still, Eric remains, which means I'll have to watch S3....

At 9:46 PM, Blogger Polly Syllabick said...

News came in yesterday that "I work constantly but you always forget my name" actor Denis O'Hare is starring next season as the local king of the vamps.

Here's hoping he kills Evan Rachel Wood. And her career.

Here's also hoping that I wake up and find that Sam Trammel has fallen into my bed, roofied and naked, due to some strange plot twist.

At 10:00 AM, Blogger Dan. said...


First time reader, but have decided to stick around as I like what I have read so far.

Over here in the UK, we have only just got halfway through the first season of TB, so I have had to catch up on the rest of it, plus season two, online.

I agree totally with what you said about the season finale. It felt very, very flat to me. I was waiting for a big pay off, considering the build up, but sadly felt let down. Still, now The Wire has finished, its still def the best thing on TV at the moment.
Really enjoyed your blog and look forward to reading more.

At 3:39 PM, Blogger Hipstercrite said...

Angie- I typically like Evan Rachel Wood, but these young stars' managers need to know where to put their client. Just like how I though Scarlett seemed kind of immature for the role in "Match Point". She looks more mature than she acts.

Hannah- you should watch it online. Not that I condone that. No.

Random Thinker and Dan- Thanks for checking out my blog! I hope to see you around more often!

Polly- I dream about Sam waking up next to me too! Along with Eric. Eric and Sam and myself. Ahhh.....

At 11:51 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

I agree with everything you said. Holy shit, that was a waste of time. The show went into a total nosedive after about halfway through the season - in the book, MaryAnne wasn't even named, was just the maenad, and pretty much showed up at the beginning & the end. You could tell they were scrabbling for material with her. And really? She's a maenad because she had a lot of sex? Oh, and don't forget, pagans are Satan worshippers! Because Dionysus is the Horned God! (Even though one is Greek and one is Celtic. Oh, and apparently Dionysus's sister was Athena. Let's rewrite some more mythology while we're at it, this is fun!) And the Horned God is Satan! Even though Dionysus/the Horned God are older than Satan. Just like...really? Granted, that's a bit of a sore spot for me, as someone who grew up non-Christian in the Bible Belt, but still - lazy, sloppy writing. It made me wonder if a. half the writing team up and left for no reason, and b. the entire writing team is unable to do more than 5 minutes of research. And not allowed to use Wikipedia. The whole thing with Eggs was super predictable, they've made Tara into a character I can't stand (don't even get me started on her mother), Bill is a pathetic pushover, just...ugh. They had good material in the books, but for some reason were just like "No! Let's make up wacky shit instead!".

And yeah, I think the books are worth reading, as long as you know what you're reading. They're not Shakespeare by any means, but they're fun fluff and have some interesting concepts. One of the things I liked about them, actually, was that the vampires (and the maenad, and some other supes) weren't presented as evil, and they weren't presented as good - just creatures entirely out of the spectrum of human ethics. But they seem to have lost that in translation to the show. Like most things. Sigh.

(PS this is Michelle from 20SB/ I hope you feel better dear!)

At 11:14 AM, Blogger vern said...

well i liked the season finale they have create enough suspense for season three that i am really looking forward to watch True Blood next season.


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