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Hipstercrite: Welcome to Austin, SXSWers!

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Welcome to Austin, SXSWers!

First post in my Austin, TX series for SXSW

It's that time of year again.
The time of year where you stock up on your Adderall or Xanax or Xantac or horse tranquilizers and set your Facebook tagged photos to private.

South by Southwest Interactive and Film will be starting this Friday, with the music portion beginning next Wednesday.
What does that mean for you?
That means your chances of getting drunk with Bill Murrary or hooking up with a hipster from Brooklyn who is in a band with the words "bear", "deer", "neon", "gold", or "black" in it have just improved.

If you're new to Austin, here is a list of traits that make our town so unique. Come and join the fun!

1.) The entire city collectively waits with bated breath for the Groupon of the day.

2.) At anytime in anyplace, your chances of hearing New Order playing on the sound system are 2 to 1.

3.) We treat music festivals like national holidays (and we really don't have a choice).

4.) Overhear conversations that start with, (person looking at their Iphone), "Oh, looks like Brooklyn Vegan is following me on Twitter. Cool." (overhear= I said it yesterday).

5.) Facebook comments like, "There is a little kids choir singing Flaming Lips and Wilco at my place of employment right now."

6.) Every single person has a mustache and we have competitions once a month to see who has the best.

Photo by Alison Narro

7.) A 24 hour pecan vending machine in the middle of nowhere.

8.) We eat migas for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and we can tell you exactly where in town the best migas are located.

9.) The rivers in Austin are made of beer and you can often find us knelt in the river bed, stuffing our goard like Augustus Gloop in Willy Wonka.

10.) We quietly judge each other on the make of our bicycles and nothing else.

11.) The older and more worn your clothing is, the more street cred you have.

12.) We do a lot of our business out of Airstream trailers. Mostly for aesthetic purposes.

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At 10:22 AM, Blogger Stacy said...

I love Hey Cupcake!

At 10:29 AM, Blogger IT said...

"Every single person has a mustache..."

What about married persons?
...and wasn't there a song called "Mustache Love?"

At 10:37 AM, Blogger Impressions Of My Life At The Moment said...

On this description alone, I must go to this before I die.

At 11:06 AM, Blogger cjschlottman said...

I wish I could jump on a plane and fly over there right now! In Macon, we have (gasp) a Cherry Blossom Festival. Use your imagination. It is far worse than it sounds. We even have beauty contests and bed races. No shit. I'm starting saving now so I can come to Austin next year.

At 11:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You make me want to live in Austin. EVERY SINGLE DAY.

At 12:21 PM, Blogger a blount said...

ah it's been raining so much lately,
which has sucked,
but it's going to make floating the beer rivers so much better this summer!

i can't wait.

At 12:49 PM, Blogger Linda said...

shhhh. our secrets!! ;)

At 1:42 PM, Blogger Christopher said...

That looks like awesomeness.

At 4:20 PM, Blogger John R. Francis said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 5:20 PM, Blogger Mel said...

Your city sounds like a blast. No wonder you love it so much.

At 5:23 PM, Blogger Benny Paul said...

1) OMG, migas! They sound delicious! They definitely don't have them in NYC! Not even the truffle-infused $50 designer chef variety, which is surprising. None whatsoever.
2) "Hooking up with a hipster from Brooklyn who is in a band with the words 'bear', 'deer', 'neon", 'gold', or 'black'" Holy shit you nailed them (no pun intended). I was trying to think of one you'd forgotten to mention, but nope- you got 'em all.

At 7:47 PM, Blogger WILDasaMINK said...

is it wrong of me to admit I have no clue what a "migas" is? Looks like something I would love to eat everyday, then polish it off w/some cupcakes and pecans. I've got to visit your town sometime soon--my kinda place!

At 8:22 PM, Blogger siovhan said...

That mustache is AMAZING.

At 6:44 AM, Blogger Johana Hill said...

That sounds like fun!

Left you an award on my blog! ;p

At 11:03 AM, Blogger tee said...

That trailer would make a kick ass tour bus. I feel this way mostly because I heart cupcakes. And wicked shiny things.


At 11:36 PM, Blogger Christine Macdonald said...

You had me at New Order.

At 3:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

wish i was there!

At 11:29 AM, Blogger said...

lmfao the migas are really good though


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