Chocolate Candy Jesus Christ

It takes a lot for me to get excited about a new band. Which is interesting because I live in Austin, TX- one of the best places to see new and pre-fucked by the diseased penis' of major corporations music. However, I'm super stoked to check out the sold-out Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros at The Independent @ 501 Studios tonight. So stoked that I put on my recently purchased 60's cream tunic for the show tonight, totally not realizing that I now look like Luke Skywalker.

Not only is this band exciting and unique, but for me, they tap into my deeply rooted fascination with the faux traveling-Evangelical-Americana-thang. I would totally change my name to "Iyzebel" and leave my life behind to travel on the road with this band. I would concoct some sort of "miracle drink" and hock it on the side of the road wearing a dress made out of rice bags.

Every aspect of their music- the gazillion member band, the diversity of their voices, the layers of traditional and uncommonly used instruments, the seemingly haphazard noises in the background all make for a fresh musical experience . Their music paints a vivid portrait in your head of a life that you've never lived, but always wanted to. A life that consists of you, your honey, and the open road.

Edward is great and all, but I can't get over the auditory wisdom and sexiness that pours out of Jade Castrinos. Man, I envisioned this weathered and tethered female Johnny Cash circa 1965 and THEN I READ SHE WAS A YOUNG GIRL THAT WORKED AT AMERICAN APPAREL AND I WAS LIKE, "DEAR LORD NO!"