TV- Jersey Shore Ends, Life Continues On

"I watch it for it's unique commentary on the current youth culture, particularly that of Italian-Americans born in and around New York City. The show is relevant because it reveals the overindulgence tendencies by the parents of Generation Y. Theses tendencies bring out primal emotions and behavior in their children and if you substitute the nail salon fingernails and big hair with claws and fur, you have yourself a show on Animal Planet".

This is what I have to say to people when they ask me why in hell I enjoy watching MTV's "Jersey Shore".

Even then they don't buy it because I'm spewing jibberish I learned in film school out of my mouth.... AND I MEAN JIBBERISH! (using the phrase "culturally relevant" over and over on film theory papers will always get you an A).

Why I watch "Jersey Shore" is a good question. Maybe it's because I like the drama; a Pollack piece of Bumpits, Affliction, and tanning oil. Or maybe it's because I myself used to vacation at the Jersey Shore as a child.

Yes, it's true.

If you're from New York state, you either went to the Island or to Jersey for Ocean getaways. My Grandma used to be half owner in a condo in Ocean City, NJ, which she illogically relinquished ownership of during the divorce of her husband who cheated on her. I'll never understand my Grandmother and her extreme dislike of confrontation at the expense of her own belongings. "Another Depression Era neurosis witnessed!", we'll all say, shaking our heads and laughing at the old woman.

After she sold her share in the condo, we would still vacation in Ocean City.
We'd rent a hotel room right next door to the condo.

I'm sure this choice to stay right next to the "dumbest decision of her life" had nothing to do with having been born during the Depression, but everything to do with her being a Jew.

My Grandmother can only enjoy herself when she knows she is suffering.

I'd look back at her walking down the boardwalk, pointing at the windows on the 21st floor saying, "Yep, there she is. You know, that used to be mine. Before John cheated on me and we got a divorce. Yep..."

So in honor of my memories at the Jersey Shore and the series finale of "Jersey Shore" this evening, I put together my best Joisy outfits and renamed myself "The Evaluation", "The Hibernation", "Glitterpoops".

(If any credit should be given to the cast of "Jersey Shore", it's their ability to come up with dumb ass names for themselves. I've been sitting here for an hour trying to think of something.)